Friday, July 17, 2020

Stagnant

It's been how long now. I've been in the same place for too long and it shows. I feel useless like this. I need to progress with something. Anything. I'm tiredof always waiting for things to get better. Hope is a stupid thing. Probably part of the reason I got stuck before. That and fear.

Thing is though I feel like if I wait or take things into my own hands these feelings won't change. I'll never change. I never did, I think. I'm still lying to myself. For how long. 

I think I've been lying for a long time. As a necessity. 
I don't know.

Change; what a joke. 

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